and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
