So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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