HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Come back. Shots need mouths.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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