I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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