Having a random hookup so left but love u
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Randomize
