So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Life is so much better after having sex.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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