how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
my phone needs a breathalizer
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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