he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
