Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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