problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
