he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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