you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
