he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
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