it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize