Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
