am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
