She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize