everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
