he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I think people are normalizing furries
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
