I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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