It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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