Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
