Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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