I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Randomize