Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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