Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
