this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
