He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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