we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
