Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
