i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
