Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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