Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
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