Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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