He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
