white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
