is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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