all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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