YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Randomize
