i'm signing you up for texting rehab
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
