Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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