We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize