I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
