You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
