Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
