Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Small penises have feelings too.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Randomize