at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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