3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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