I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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