I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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