I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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